Oh so much to do...

OH man. I am back at that point again of wanting to be so much better than I am. I mean, better at doing things, I know I am just a fine person - God loves me, right?, I just have so many thoughts of things to do and so little action steps actually doing them. I'm guessing because I am on here all the time. That kind of throws a wrench into getting anything done!

And yet, I know I really don't have all that much time right now either. Have you really ever logged how much time you actually need to attend to an almost three month old baby and an almost two year old toddler?? Not to mention all the to and from of the preschooler and kindergartner. Yes, I realize I am busy doing a very good work for these kiddos. However, there comes a point where I know there is more. More I should be doing. Or rather more I want to be doing.

I have been reading great books lately (over the last 6 months or so) that have really helped me be happy in my station as a Mother - raising these kiddos to know God, and I mean to really know Him and WHY they know Him and should want to know Him and hopefully where to find all these truths from the Bible. And being a Wife and being a helper for my husband (which I unfortunately fall down in constantly.) I am totally understanding, now, more of the reasons God put me here and that I need to embrace this - trying to fight it all only leads to strife on many levels.

I am learning that I have always been, and still am, so incredibly selfish!! Oh, I can justify it in many ways, like a sentence I was typing earlier that didn't fit there and now I realize why: These kids just take so much time from me, I automatically go to "me time" (ie - computer) when I have a spare minute and I don't do the chores, or the extras that I know would be benificial. Why do I do that? Why can't I just, again, "get it together" and get stuff done?!!

I don't want to justify any more. I just want to DO and be done. I have got to get more disciplined in my life. I am starting a "chore chart" for the kids - they have been clamoring for it for awhile... and I think I need to do one for myself as well. Maybe it would actually give me some external motivation for doing what I should be doing. Give myself my own props for getting something done around here. I know, "Do as unto the Lord", and I am starting to really grasp the meaning of that now, given that I am understanding more of the wife and mother roles as given from God and the true importance of both pieces. It has just been hard for me to do - mainly getting myself put aside and truly putting others first and what that truly means.

And you get that little taste of time after your child gets to a certain age where you realize you do have more "free" time and then...oops, another child comes. And now I am back where I was before feeling like there is so much to do and so little time, and using that time so unwisely.

Ah, discipline, discipline, discipline. I have got to get further in the current book I am reading: The Disciplines of the Beautiful Woman. Maybe that will help me! I'll let you know! :-)



Oh, and someday, I hope to post again about "Fabrics" and "Gardens".
....someday.

Has anyone ever...

...taken a look at this book? I saw it on another blog and thought it looked interesting, just wondering if any of you have it or have taken a look at it?

We are not a homeschooling family (so far, though we do try to be learning/teaching/involved all the time), but the scheduling part, esp. with 4 kids now, looks very intriguing! I tend to be a scheduler anyway, but having a resource to help catch everything might be nice? (You can click on the book picture to go to their website.) Maybe I can pull enough out of it from the Table of Contents to make something work for us?

I realize just having the schedule isn't enough and the actual implementation of it is key. It is just hard to remember everything and get it in there on the list. I have heard of homeschooling moms taking a weekend "off" (or even just a day) where they go to a hotel by themselves in the summer before starting school to "pull it all together" and plan their school year/schedules and I was thinking how nice that sounds -- to be able to have peace and quiet to remember everything... of course by this time I just may need the chaos to think! Maybe I could have just 1/2 of a day to "pull it all together", but right now, I would probably just sleep!!!!!

I'm also looking into various "organizing" books and homemaking and mother/daughter type books, some from the blog I referenced earlier. (Probably good to teach H-girl some girly things since the house is now full of boys!!) I just can't seem to get more than a couple things done in a week. This includes every chore there is. Only a couple each week. Seriously. I know some of you probably vacuum twice a day and mop more, but that doesn't happen here. My poor husband. Hopefully I can get it together (...hmmm ...is there a theme here??) now that I am not pregnant and get this house into shape. It would be nice after 10 years that a wife could get her house in order!!


Maybe you should pray for my husband.

The poor man.

School Starts... Blogging Stops?

Is this how it works? I was wanting more "schedule" in my day, but is this it? Is there really a schedule? Ummm, where does blogging fit in???

Maybe I'm just not there yet. I was having the B man get his shoes on a whole hour before we were supposed to leave to get the H girl yesterday... totally messed up on time. (Granted it takes him a while to get them on, but a bit extreme in this case!)

I am not settled into a routine for sure. The kids are getting closer to it, though it has been a transition for B to go to school on different days than last year (M,W,F instead of T,TH). He gets confused with that. H seems to like going everyday.

And they are so tired! This PM kindergarten/preschool stuff is hard on us! The kids need naps still, but doing them when we get home is too late, too close to bed time - not that they would do it at 4PM anyway... And after being babies they have not napped before lunchtime so that is out of the question now. A couple times I have gotten B to sit with me for some quiet time on the couch with his blanket before lunch, but never H.

So we are working on it.

It just seems like we are spending our mornings just waiting for lunch to come around so we can go to school. There isn't yet any real defined activity times that we do things in the morning except the TV goes off by 8/8:30 depending on what time we are done with breakfast... then get dressed and then free playtime with a small snack around 9:30 and then lunch around 11:15/30 (so we can get toys put away, ready to leave for school around 12:05.)

So writing it out here, it looks like I could (if I really wanted to/had the energy to/really obeyed what I should do...) put in some kind of Mommy&Kids activity between 9:30 and 11:30. I have thought of a "chore jar", or some Christian homeschool curriculum (just something light and fun since H is in public school now not Christian preschool anymore), or some other form of activity.

Here are some thoughts now that I am sitting in the quiet (yes, older two are quietly playing together and lil'D is napping...) and thinking...

Maybe one day is "game day" to play board games or outside together (Monday?);
another a "learning day" for worksheets or special Bible reading, etc. (Wednesday?);
maybe two days of the "chore jar" (Tues/Thurs);
and what for another day?? "Art", "Kids choice"? ...hmmm, those scare me a little! :)

(I would love to hear some more ideas from anyone here...)

Not to mention filling in the time with the things I need to be doing like dishes, laundry (I have already noticed that I am not hanging out the laundry as often because of the time crunch...bummer), other cleaning, figuring out dinner.

I have already been able to determine I am not going to get through this (hmmm...life?) without a meal plan for the week, and I am not going to be able (usually, depending on the meal) to get away with "starting dinner" after the kids get home from school (3:30-4 ish.) There are too many needs/wants the kids all have during that time that I just can't focus on the kitchen stuff...which is usually a disaster by that time anyway. I feed the kids a small snack when they get home and we talk about their day, but with lil' D being awake also, he isn't willing to sit for as long as the other kids, and then "the chase is on."



It is so hard not to turn on that TV and "plug them in" for awhile... but I am doing really well so far at not until I "have to" to get through. (Oh, yeah, yesterday was a bad day, I was quite a grouch from 3 'till 6 ish...headache, mean, tears, ask for forgiveness, etc..) :-{ So, when the older two are at school, I need to get any errands done while in town, then come home, entertain lil'D (because he rarely has a nap after the morning one... ...gee, he has a bit of a strange schedule, but it seems to work for him), give him some "Mommy time" - he loves sitting and reading books then- and trying to get what I can going for dinner while chasing an 18 month old out of the kitchen. Fun, fun! :-)

And, looking at it all from this vantage point, it is fun.

Or at least like mostly fun,
should be fun,
except the tough parts,
and that is my call to reach out to God for help.

I am reading a great book right now, really inspiring, called Passionate Housewives Desperate for God and it is really helping me to see God's vision for women/mothers. It is a quick read; unless you want to look up every verse referenced for context, and then it will take you f-o-r-e-v-e-r! There is a lot of Scripture packed in there - it would be a great book to pass along to young Christian wives/mothers, maybe for Christmas? It is far from being about perfectionism - since there is only One who is perfect! But real. Written from the vantage point of real women who have been there, who are there, who have lived to tell about the blessings.


So, as it goes, we are working on it. I am working on it. A life in process. Hopefully progress!

For I am confident of this very thing,
that He who began a good work in you
will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.
Philippians 1:6

House "Cleaning"

I'm still here!! But I'm in the process of getting the house in order after a $42 loss of keys. The house is torn apart (after looking all over for previously said keys) and needs to get put back together - with a (standard) place for everything!

But, preparing dinner comes before blogging (or so I am told!) hee hee.
Just saw on another site (which she also got from another site...)
"Duty before Desire."
Wow.
Well said.

So I am off on my "Duty."
We'll talk again soon.
Well, sometime, I have a lot to do!!!!!!